Here We Go Again :)

My name is Karen Munoz, I'm fifteen years old, and as a lot of you already know, next summer I will be going on yet another service trip with Children's Global Alliance. Having been on two trips with CGA before, I am more than excited to be going on yet another. This time, the team will be traveling to Arusha, Tanzania, where we will be volunteering at L.O.A.M.O, a school that is home to 250 children ranging from babies to seventh graders. There, we will be making improvements to the school, assisting the teachers in the classrooms, going on home visits, coming up with lesson plans, and providing the school with supplies.

I've been asked on multiple occasions why I'm so caught up with these service trips. I've never truly been able to give a straight answer. There are so many factors that contribute into it, it's kinda hard to explain. The children I've had the pleasure to meet thus far have flipped my world upside-down completely. It's an indescribable feeling really, knowing that you're the reason behind someones smile, and knowing that you're making an impact in someones life. What people don't realize though, is how much of an impact the children have made in mine.

They say the most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire. These trips are my fuel.

And… Scene. Wrapping Up Some Feelings.

 Sorry guys, it's going to be a long one...

         Nothing in the word compares to the 6 days that were spent at Escuela Especial. This experience exceeded all expectations. So much time and effort was put into accomplishing what yesterday might have seemed impossible. At the end of the day, all of the blood, sweat, and tears shed were definitely worth it.

         I came into this trip knowing exactly what I was going to do. You can never be too prepared, but I learned sign and had some lesson plans ready. I knew what I was going to do, but one of my biggest fears was not knowing how to do it; It's a whole different story when dealing with children who are disabled. After the first 5 minutes in the classroom with the kids, that fear was immediately replaced with other emotions that were more thoroughly developed later on in the experience.

         One of the first emotions I felt was hope. I was hopeful that at least for a couple of days, these kids would receive the love and attention they desperately need and deserve. Overall, I just wanted them to be happy. Even if it was just for the time we were there.

         Throughout the trip, the hope was always present, but there were also some unexpected, darker emotions that came up. These emotions were anger, frustration, and sadness. Emotions like these were evoked by my experience with Joulisa and Marlin. Joulisa is 24. She has Cerebral Palsy, and a very ignorant mom. Marlin is 26. She was completely normal until the age of 14, and has been living in hell ever since her bones started deteriorating. We believe that it's Parkinson's disease, but she is completely undiagnosed. Her mom hasn't bothered to take her to the doctor, and she uses a hill that she supposedly can't get Marlin down from as her excuse. I've been to her home. I managed to get her down with a little help, so it is definitely not impossible. The one thing Marlin and Joulisa have in common, is a mom who couldn't possibly care less. That is where the anger comes to play. It's not fair that these girls get treated worse than animals in their own homes, by their own parents. I can't even begin to understand how these moms live with themselves and go on throughout their days as if nothing is wrong.

         On the last day at the school, we had a party in honor of all the wonderful children we had the pleasure to meet. All of the kids we met on the home visits were invited as well, and I had the opportunity to go pick up the ones who had no way of getting there. This day was an emotional roller coaster for me. As curious as I am, I asked Magali (social services worker) who we were going to pick up. She showed me a list, but Joulisa wasn't on it. I asked Magali why and she explained that after Joulisa's home visit, Joulisa's mom told her that she was definitely not taking Joulisa to the party. I was enraged. Actually, I don't quite know how I was feeling. This lady was given a full ride. She had the chance to take Joulisa out for the first time in god knows how long, where she would be fed and well taken care of, and she wasn't going to take it. I made it my mission to get Joulisa to that party. I asked Magali if we could stop by her house anyway. She said that it probably wouldn't be a good idea, as Joulisa's mom was not too happy after the home visit, but I was determined. After a lot of persuasion, we made it happen. If I hadn't spoken up about Joulisa, she probably wouldn’t have been fed for the day. I definitely felt a sense of accomplishment, but there was also a wave of frustration that came a long with it. At the party, Joulisa started to have a seizure. Her mom spread her arms out to try to hide her from the people around, and she literally yelled at her and told her to stop as if she could control it. 

         At times like these I really wished I didn't speak Spanish. Another fear of mine was hearing things I didn't want to hear; things that would break my heart. Speaking Spanish was an advantage, but it definitely took a toll on me emotionally. It was all part of the experience though. I wouldn't change a thing. Everything I heard and saw, and even had to translate, only opened my eyes and made me appreciate everything I have a million times more. Working with the kids was phenomenal. Every single one of them stole my heart. Being aware of how they are treated at home and still seeing a smile on their faces was surreal, and knowing that in that moment in time, we were the reason behind their smiles, was truly overwhelming. Those kids completely won me over without even trying. There will always be room for them in my heart. Having to say goodbye was terrible, but thinking back and reflecting on everything that we accomplished with them definitely makes the fact that we're not there anymore slightly (not really) less painful. I feel incredibly blessed for this extraordinary opportunity. These trips are something words will never be enough to completely capture.

This is what I like to do. This is what makes me happy… 

and this is only the beginning. 

April 9th, 2014

It’s incredible to me how much you can learn and how much your perspective can change within the course of 4 days. Every day spent in Nicaragua so far has been an experience of its own, and I have loved every second of it.

Yesterday, we got the opportunity to visit the family of a child who is blind, Jesus. Jesus and his family live in the most extraordinary conditions imaginable. Along with 15 other relatives, they run a circus. They have about 7 tents set up; 1 big one (where the show happens), and 6 smaller ones… which is where the family of 25 lives. We did not get to meet them all, but we did get to meet a couple of the kids and speak to Juan (Jesus’ dad). He informed us that they have no running water, no electricity, no refrigeration, and that the stove they once had was stolen about 2 weeks ago. It was surreal just to think that people actually live like that. Walking in there was unbearable. The family barely gets by, and on top of their living conditions, their general health is horrible. Jesus needs eye surgery, Juan has diabetes, there is a newborn baby in the house that is barely breathing and all of the children there have stomach worms. I walked out of that house with tears in my eyes and a broken heart.

We had planned to go grocery shopping after the home visit, and that is exactly what we did. There, Lisa Marie had the most heartwarming idea. We put together a cart which consisted of food, everyday cleaning supplies, and a cooler and ice. Then, we went back to the circus and surprised them with the groceries. To us, it was nothing. To them, it meant the world. The expression on their faces compared to how I would react if someone bought me a car. They were incredibly thankful. Juan was speechless. He literally told us that he was physically unable to put into words how much the gesture meant to him. As he was talking, tears started flowing. I too was speechless as to how incredibly grateful they all where. It felt SO satisfying knowing that the family would have yet another meal on the table.

We often forget that it’s the little things in life that go the farthest. Giving and knowing you can’t possibly get anything in return is just an indescribable feeling.

April 7th, 2014

               Two days into the trip and I’m already completely in love. Everything about it so far has been incredible. From cleaning the school to meeting the children, I have loved every second of it.

               Today, we arrived at the school first thing in the morning and anxiously waited for the kids to arrive. I can’t even begin to explain how excited I was to see them.  I was inside one of the classrooms when all of a sudden, the white school van pulled up. The doors opened and a swarm of kids came out. Within 5 seconds we were surrounded. It was a feeling like no other. They approached us like they had known us for years and clung onto on to us like their lives depended on it. I did not get the opportunity to meet all of them because class had begun, but that was by far the greatest thing I have ever experienced.

               Connecting with the kids was easier than expected. Tania is a 15-year-old girl I got the pleasure to meet. She was in the class I taught. In the beginning, she was really shy. I would sign to her but she wouldn’t really respond. By the end of the day we were best friends. I tried really hard getting through to her and it was definitely worth it. She’s really funny and she taught me a lot of new sign I didn’t know. With the short time I spent with her, Tania has already won a special place in my heart. 

               I got the privilege to work in the deaf classroom. It’s a whole different world in there; the kids are wonderful. The classroom consists of 6 kids-3 girls and 3 boys. I went in knowing nothing but the alphabet in sign. I didn’t know what to expect, so naturally, I was pretty nervous. I got over that awkward/shy phase quicker than I expected though. I just went for it without a second though and it went really well. Mirna, the teacher, already had a lesson planned for them so I went off of it, and added some things of my own that I thought would be useful information to the children. I also taught new sign from a sign book and had an awesome time trying to communicate with the kids.

               Being here is such an incredible blessing. Literally every second of every day spent here so far has been amazing. There are absolutely no words to describe how incredibly thankful I am for this opportunity.

Who are three people who have inspired you?

When given this question, three names automatically came to mind. First on that list would be my mom. I can’t imagine life without her. She has always been there for me. Whenever I need someone to listen, I know I can always count on her. She has been through a lot and she has an incredible way of coping through though times. The things I most admire about her are her strength and courage. She has been an incredible role model and I can honestly say that I’m very lucky to have her in my life. My mom is one of the only people who have been with me through thick and thin. She can read me better than anyone. She’s the person who can make me smile when no one else can and I love her more than anything.

Another person who inspires me is Demi Lovato. It is heart warming to me that someone as famous and talented as her takes time to focus on things that are important to her. Like bullying. She was bullied when she was younger so she knows what it’s like. She has a big voice and she uses it to spread awareness. That to me is very inspirational.

Last but not least, Lisa Marie comes to mind when I think of people who inspire me. She has made the biggest impact in my life and I look up to her more than I look up to anyone. She doesn’t like being praised but she definitely deserves it. I’ve never met anyone with a bigger heart. Lisa Marie is the type of person that brings out your full potential. She will push you to your limits only to help you become a better person. I know I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for her. But enough about what she has done for me… This woman lives for helping others, and CGA is all about that. Lisa Marie inspires me on so many different levels and I know it sounds kind of cheesy, but I’m definitely going to strive to be more like her when I grow up. I couldn’t possibly be more thankful to have such a wonderful person in my life.

If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?

If I could be any animal I would probably be a lion. Lions are fearless. They are cautious yet they don’t over think things. They’re very intuitive and I definitely need more of that in my life. To some people, lions can come off as scary, but scary is not the word I would use to describe them. Lions are not afraid to show that they are in control, and that to me is a sign of a good leader. 

Without a doubt, experiences like these are life changing. Going to Cambodia really opened my eyes and made me realize how good I have it. It also made me see that I am much more capable than I ever thought I was. Personally, I went into the trip with this picture in my head of how I thought things would be, but quite honestly, the trip exceeded all expectations, and it was nothing like I pictured it. With that said, I have absolutely no idea what to expect for Nicaragua. In the process of working really hard and being put to the test, both mentally and physically, not only do you accomplish the unimaginable, you also learn wonders about yourself. If Nicaragua is anything like Cambodia, I know that I will come back a much better person. 

I believe that the most difficult part of the experience for me will be going on the home visits. I've heard a lot of stories and read blogs from the trip before, and every time I find myself with tears in my eyes. I can't even imagine what actually being there and living it for myself will be like. In Cambodia, I witnessed devastating conditions. Judging from the things I've heard about Nicaragua, they live in pretty harsh conditions, but on top of their living conditions, the kids are disabled as well. I'm fairly good at keeping it together, but in situations like these, controlling my emotions will definitely be difficult for me. 

Never in my life have I worked with children who are disabled. My biggest fear would probably be not knowing exactly how to interact with those wonderful kids. By interact, I mean teach mostly. I've taught kids before, but not kids with special needs. I know It will be different, and It worries me not knowing how to approach them. I don't know much about their disabilities, which only makes me eager to learn more. I'm sure interacting and communicating won't always be easy, but I want to make sure I give them my all, because they definitely deserve it.